Very interesting perspective on straight me v. gay me.

I can relate to much of what you say, but I have lived it both ways. I was married, two kids, living a heteronormative life. I was a pseudo-straight person for forty years, although I didn’t even know the “pseudo” part. I thought I was straight.

But you, know, Dale, I still didn’t fit in. I couldn’t fit in because I didn’t know how to connect with those cousins. I did when I was young but as I got older, I found that I couldn’t because so much of who I was I hid.

A few years ago, I decided enough. I was to give the closing remarks as our family reunion broke up. I thought, “Here’ my chance.”

I said, we have two big secrets in this family: Grandpa shot himself and I’m gay.

Some in the family haven’t forgiven me. Some for the suicide secret, some for the gay secret. I shattered the facade that we were a special family. We loved every one, but still, we are just a bit better than them.

I still love my ex-wife, my kids, my siblings and I just lost my favorite uncle at 95 years old.

I have family now, some by blood, some by choice. But I don’t miss being part of a family that feels like we are just a little bit better than all of those other families out there.

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