Not every man who has sex with men is gay.

An interviewer once said, “Any man who has had a penis is his mouth is gay.”

I tried (unsuccessfully)to explain that our sexual identity is for each of us to decide for ourselves.

In one study, 10% of men who defined themselves as heterosexual had sex exclusively with other men. Labeling themselves as gay was too toxic.

Some men are curious or questioning. Some are married and conflicted. Some seek only easy pleasure.

Because of the risk of transmission of HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases, the CDC describes this broad category of men as simply, “Men who have sex with me.” It is a behavioral definition, not a definition of sexual identity.



Loren A Olson MD

Gay father; Psychiatrist; Award-winning author FINALLY OUT. Chapter excerpt here: http://bit.ly/2EyhXTY Top writer on Medium. Not medical advice.