I’ve written about bisexuality before and it has gotten me into some trouble, but I’ll wade into this rip tide again.

My major contention is that there is a significant difference between bisexual Identity and bisexual Behavior. I agree with the definition you’ve given, and according to GLAAD, bisexuality is defined as “A person who has the capacity to form enduring physical, romantic, and/ or emotional attractions to those of the same gender or to those of another gender.”

The key word in their definition — the one that distinguishes identity and behavior — is “enduring.” It is what I am now; it is what I expect I always will be. It’s part of your core identity.

In the work that I do I often counsel with men who describe themselves as bisexual because they believe they are behaving in a bisexual-like way. Many would identify as straight, curious, or questioning, certainly not gay. The CDC uses the awkward term of men who have sex with men to describe them, and although it is clumsy, it is more descriptive of their behavior.

I speak with so many men who will stay married to their wives while having secret same-sex liaisons, and as the CDC says, they are a significant factor in transmitting HIV and STDs to others. I’m not gay so I don’t need to go on PrEP! Many of these men also have some of the greatest mental health problems because they don’t want to want what they want while they struggle to control their same-sex attractions.

My major point is that “bisexuality” is such a broad umbrella, and it is my belief that the mental health issues of bisexuals and MSM are significantly different.

I welcome your opinion.

Written by

Gay father; Psychiatrist; Award-winning author FINALLY OUT. Chapter excerpt here: http://bit.ly/2EyhXTY Top writer on Medium. Not medical advice.

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